The Bachelorette Party

I never wanted a bachelorette party. I associate them with drunken frat parties and sorority rushing. But then someone at my bridal shower jokingly said, “So who’s going to organize the bachelorette?” and I piped in with, “I’ve never been to a strip club!” It was true, I hadn’t. And why should guys have all the fun? “Let’s go to a male strip club,” I said, half-jokingly. Then Whitney organized it. Only Whitney couldn’t find a straight male strip club in San Francisco (how pathetic is that?), so she planned a night at Asia SF, with the choice of a trannie show and dinner upstairs or a private party with a male stripper downstairs. I chose the private party mainly because it included a scavenger hunt, and I love scavenger hunts. We ended up getting the best of both worlds because one of the transvestites did shows for the bachelorettes who had chosen the spotlight show over the male stripper (I chose the male stripper because I hate being in the spotlight more than I hate men shaking their things in my face) AND we got to see all the transvestites dance to musical numbers upstairs while I was searching the security guard and spanking the bouncer (as part of my scavenger hunt.) First we ordered drinks and had a private buffet dinner—chicken satay, soba noodles, tofu and seafood—then we watched the other girls’ spotlight shows and danced for a while, then my friends made me drink two more cocktails before they stuffed my boots and bra with one-dollar bills. I have to say the stripper show was pretty entertaining. I couldn’t bear to touch his oily body (ew), but I was laughing really hard when he made me lie on the ground so he could mimick “doing me” in different positions. Turned on I was not; hysterical I was. And now there are plenty of incriminating pictures of me on the Internet so I’ll appear well rounded – just one o’ the gals – if I ever decide to run for office. By the end of the night I was drunk enough to give the DJ a lap dance. Yep, a lap dance. Amazing what six extra-sized cocktails will do for your self-confidence. (The photo is of me with Simone, one of Asia SF’s transvestite performers.)

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “The Bachelorette Party

  1. Lol. Glad you had a great, blackmail-worthy time. 😉 You seem to be having a blast!

  2. And btw, Simone is gorgeous! holy crap, who is her stylist? 🙂

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